Blessed Michael J. McGivney, founder of Knights of Columbus

Lectionary: 417

His disciples said to him, “If that is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.”
Jesus answered, “Not all can accept this word, but only those to whom that is granted.

I met a church-going woman once who told me she'd been married six times, including twice to the same man. She said that she must marry one of her exes again because he said he would kill himself if she didn't. 

I asked her, "Did you ever consider that maybe you should not have married anyone in the first place?"

She had never thought of that, nor had her Christian denomination ever suggested celibacy as a holy way of life. 

The disciples in today's gospel are dumbfounded by Jesus's strict teaching about marriage, "...what God has joined together, man must not separate.”

They assumed, as people do today, that everyone gets married and should get married. The only question is "To whom?" (And today, which gender and for how long?) That apparent obligation often forces them to marry anyone since anyone pretty much fits the bill. And they can always divorce if it doesn't work out. 

Jesus disagreed in his day, and the Risen Lord through his Church still disagrees. 

Our life in God begins with baptism, which is an act of God. The LORD chooses each of us through that Sacrament and draws us more deeply into divine life through Eucharist and Confirmation. To some he grants the Sacrament of Marriage -- and to a specific person. (Not just anyone.) 

Happily married couples agree they were meant for each other. Sometimes, amidst a quarrel, they have to swallow hard as they admit it. But on anniversaries and special occasions, as they reflect upon their lives together, they recognize By the Lord has this been done and it is wonderful in our sight. (Which is why we have anniversaries!) 

Our life in the Spirit begins with obedience, that readiness and willingness to listen to God's specific direction for each of us. We must be patient; we must be willing to abide in the darkness and doubt of uncertainty. 

I have met some people who were never chosen although they expected and longed for marriage. No one proposed marriage to them, nor did they enter the Church's regular life of the convent or brotherhood. But they did follow God's Spirit to a full life of engagement in family, church, volunteer, and political activism. 

God has a plan for each of us. He guides those who wait on his guidance.