Monday of the Second Week in Lent

Lectionary: 230

Stop judging and you will not be judged.

Stop condemning and you will not be condemned.

Forgive and you will be forgiven.

It is our custom to confess our sins to a priest during the season of Lent. But we need not judge ourselves or anyone else. Just as the accused waits upon the judge for a verdict of guilt or innocence, so do we go before God in the sacrament and confess our sins. What the Lord makes of that is God's business, not our own.

That, I find, is a hard lesson to learn.  Eager to judge others, I am equally hard on myself.

I well remember the first time a friend said, "Don't be too hard on yourself." I had no idea what she meant by that. First, I didn't realize I had developed these lifelong habits of self-accusation and self-condemnation. If I did those things, I was only doing "what everybody does." But, whether everybody does those things are  not, they're bad habits and not necessary.

A habit, of course, is a deed repeated. First I do it; and, for whatever reason, I like the results. Then I repeat it and again enjoy some kind of satisfaction. Then I do it repeatedly and even carelessly; until I do it mindlessly and habitually, as if it were an instinct. But the human being has no instincts and any habit can be unlearned, dismissed, forgotten.

Some people quit judging themselves under the influence of a secular culture that dismisses the very idea of sin. While they agree that some of the worse behavior is criminal and criminals should be at least ashamed of themselves -- if not exterminated -- they cannot call it "sin" because that would recognize God's authority. They just blow off bad deeds that are not caught or condemned and decide to feel neither shame nor remorse or guilt. They have learned that the worst feelings pass because they are, after all, just feelings.

Christians learn to stop judging in obedience to the Lord. As the Apostle James says,

Do not speak evil of one another, brothers. Whoever speaks evil of a brother or judges his brother speaks evil of the law and judges the law. If you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.There is one lawgiver and judge who is able to save or to destroy. Who then are you to judge your neighbor?

I have also appreciated Saint Paul's retort:

I do not even pass judgment on myself; I am not conscious of anything against me, but I do not thereby stand acquitted; the one who judges me is the Lord.

And so, with the necessary aid of the Holy Spirit, we set aside the practice and habit of judging ourselves and others. If this opinion of another's  behavior is not THINK -- True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, and Kind -- we can let it pass. Not everything I think needs to be said. If we suffer an overwhelming urge to say something, we still ask the Holy Spirit to guide us. The Spirit of God, as Father Germain used to say, will take hold of my tongue and bind it to the roof of my mouth. Or, as they say in the South, "Well, hush my mouth and call me 'Silent!'"

Christians love silence. We hear and speak the Word of God in silence; and, out of respect for silence, we often refrain from thinking, speaking, and acting. In silence our habits have less authority. We can discover their hegemony, consider whether they still serve our best purposes, make adjustments, or resolve to let them go altogether. In silence we remember. "...the one who judges is the Lord."